Urge =)

hmm.. nothing much. just have the urge of setting up a blog to share my experience, my thoughts and what i have been doing lately.. i guess this blog will definitely fill up with the memories that i will always keep and i never forget. i named my blog title as ' a new life. a new me. a new family' .

A new life refers to my baby girl, we are all anticipating for her arrival at the end of june. Its exciting with a mixture of anxiety feeling. oh yes. Its getting nearer, day by day i can feel her movement inside me so strong and active. Its amazing. Tats what i can feel. Just gotten some milkbottles and some necessary things for this baby.. so fast gonna be 7 months soon.. look.. so cute.. all pink pink de..hee.

A new me. Already became someone's wife and soon becoming a mother. My thoughts, views, emotions and feeling towards things happening around me changed. Yes of course, its a must to change isnt? I feel that im a changed person, not like before. Somehow, Somewhere, Someparts of me changed.. but i cant figure it out where.. actually i guess im still myself just that my thinking becoming more differently. How diff? i also not sure. just feel so. Now i understand being a mum is not easy, i always respect my mum and admire her. But... now, after knowing that im a mother-soon-to-be, i respect my mum even more. More than ever. Im grateful to my parents, esp my mother who helped me all this while. I owed her lots.

A new family. From 24th of march onwards, i have a family of my own. I remembered clearly and always kept that in mind of what the solemniser said to my husband and i that day.

He said..
"From this very moment onwards, you are husband and wife, both of you have to learn to accept each other no matter how and must learn to appreciate each other, doesn't means that after you have signed that paper, courtship is over, its not that, both of you still can have courtship in this marriage."

He told me that i have to learn to appreciate my husband who will be always working hard outside for this family and dan have to learn to appreciate me for being a housewife taking care of the house and baby. He mentioned that after signing the paper, what both of us do is not and cannot think of " i " but must think of " we". This is exactly what aileen wrote in that book for us too, which is true and i understand it.

My husband, Ramdan is working hard for this family, i must also bucked up. In terms of my thinking and all.. cos' for sometime ago my thoughts was always that negative, depressed and felt like im all alone in this world. I cried, breakdown cos of those negative thoughts inside me. But i felt alot alot better now... cos' i still have my gd buddies around me who encouraged me, that makes me stand up and face it with positive thoughts. I even went for counselling, the counselor lady is sweet, she encourage me to face it with positive attitude be it the situation turn out to be bad or good, i just have to accept it. She would call and ask how is my husband and i doing, asking me to be happy and not to worry too much as it will affect the baby. yup. Not only my buddies, my good friend cum neighour also help me lots. Thanx.. she always come up and accompany me when she is free, thats so sweet of her. n of cos.. not forgetting my classmates karen, janise, yq and jas =) . Beside them.... i guess i really want to thank my husband.. he is always here. From the day that we found out my pregnancy, he never once abandon me..leave me or shaft me aside. Knowing he is stress and frustrated but he is still dealing with me, my emotions and my negative thoughts so calmly, consolling me. Im just glad. or rather.. more than glad.